


The Fragile Kingdom Fold

by Bluehaven4220



Series: Benton Fraser and Kelly McShane: The Never Ending Why [1]
Category: due South
Genre: F/M, Kid Fic, Past Relationship(s), Pre-Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-12
Updated: 2015-10-12
Packaged: 2018-04-26 02:06:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,735
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4985878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bluehaven4220/pseuds/Bluehaven4220
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Benton Fraser and Kelly McShane had been best friends for years, until one day they grew apart and lost touch. Now, when he returns to visit her in the middle of the night four years later, he finds a woman completely changed by life and circumstance, and in need of a friend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Fragile Kingdom Fold

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ButterflyGhost](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ButterflyGhost/gifts), [Ride_Forever](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ride_Forever/gifts).



> Dedicated to ButterflyGhost and Ride_Forever, whose stories and comments gave me the courage to continue writing my own Due South fan fiction. I really hope you like this one.

If only it were that simple, to understand why she was so unhappy.

But he did.

He understood it so much better now. All the attitude, all the flippant remarks, all the running, her decision to come with him into the Arctic for a while… now he understood why.

She was hurting, and she had been for a very long time.

When he’d first told her about his plans for the Academy, she’d seemed surprised, but overall accepting, and then when he’d mentioned that name…

That’s when she’d flown into a rage. A silent rage at first, but he had seen it. It started with her jaw… it tightened whenever he tried to speak to her, and for hours at a time she would say nothing. Then it progressed to her fists, once into the wall, another aimed for his chest. He had caught the second in his hand, and said nothing.

And then the water. She’d go into the shower and stay for at least two hours, and that’s when he’d hear it.

Tears…  floods of them.

But it wasn’t just tears. She’d be talking to herself, furiously looking for soap. While he’d never entered the bathroom whilst she’d been in the shower, he could hear her. “Oh God, get it off of me!” she’d weep.

And it tore at him. The sound at first would be like a wounded animal struggling to breathe, but then it would give to gentle sobs, and then it would stop. When she would emerge, he could see the effects from the heated water on her hands and arms, but there was silence between the two of them, for he never asked why.

When they parted ways, he still never asked why.

Maybe it was better that way.

 **ooOoo**  

It seemed a lifetime ago, she mused as she settled down to bed, having gotten lost in her memories again. Unfortunately, she’d only just gotten to sleep when she felt a little hand tugging on her sleeve.

“Mommy, I saw a noise…”

“You did?” Kelly pushed herself up in bed and swung her legs over. “Where did you see this noise?” Of course, the poor thing had mixed things up again, but really, it wasn’t so important.

“In the front yard…”

“Alright, it’s okay, honey. What do you say we put on our housecoat and boots and go see what we can find, hmm? We’ll be Mummy and Rachel, Super Investigators!”

“What’s Investigators?”

“It means we look for things that are different, things that we’ve never seen or heard of before. We don’t have to be afraid of new things… an old friend taught me that.”

So they put on their housecoats and boots and went out onto the porch to wait. Rachel remained attached to Kelly’s hip; because even if Mommy said there was nothing to worry about, new things could be a little scary.

Then she heard it. The unmistakable whine and groan of the truck coming up the driveway…

And with this particular truck came…

A rather handsome man opened the driver’s side door (Rachel covering her eyes and letting out a small scream), and stepped out.

“Hello Kelly…” a familiar voice greeted her.

Kelly’s mouth hung open slightly, and, setting Rachel on the ground, she approached him.

She reached out a hand and touched his cheek. Leaning forward, she kissed his other cheek before allowing him to wrap his arms tightly around her.

“Hello Benton…” she whispered against his shoulder, breathing in his scent. She’d almost forgotten how much she enjoyed the smell of him, like a spice she couldn’t name, but it didn’t matter.

Rachel approached him and tugged on his pant leg. “Excuse me…”

He let Kelly go and looked down at the child who stared at him in wonder and awe, her big brown eyes engaging.

“Yes, young lady?” he answered, bending down to her level and making eye contact.

“What’s your name?”

“My name is Constable Benton Fraser, RCMP,” he lifted his hat to her. “And what’s your name?”

“Rachel…” she answered. “Rachel Joanne McShane.”

“It’s lovely to meet you, Rachel,” he flicked her nose and smiled. Kelly found it endearing that his voice did not portray the confusion he was sure to have been feeling.

“Would you like to come in, Benton?” Kelly asked, threading her arm through his. “It’s no use standing out in the cold, and Rachel’s got to get back to bed.”

“But Mommy, tomorrow’s Saturday…” she pouted.

“Yes, and that also means you have homework to do.”

“But it’s only counting…”

“Counting homework or not, you still need your sleep. You’re a growing girl.”

“But what about the Investigators?” Stalling even at two in the morning.

“Oh that’s right,” Kelly unhooked her arm from Benton's. “Benton, indulge me?”

He nodded.

“Well what do you think, Investigator Rachel? Did we find what the noise was?”

She nodded.

“And was it safe?”

Again, a nod.

“I agree. Benton is a good man, and an even better storyteller.”

Rachel’s eyes lit up at the mention of stories. “Can he tell me a story?”

He smiled and chuckled. “Yes I can, but your mother said it was time for bed. In the morning I’ll tell you a story.”

And that’s what did it. Rachel nodded, and held out her arms. Kelly picked her up and carried her back to the house, Benton following close behind. He held the door open so Kelly could get in without having to shift the little girl from one arm to the other, and sat himself in her living room while she put Rachel back to bed.

When she emerged, she went straight to the kitchen and put the kettle on. Silently, she poured two cups of tea and brought them into the living room.

“She’s gorgeous, Kelly,” he told her, accepting a mug and briefly warming his hands before setting it down.

“Thank you Ben,” she looked into her own mug. “She’ll be five years old next week. I can’t believe it’s been that long.”

“I don’t mean to be indelicate, but who is her father?”

“That’s not something I’m prepared to answer at two in the morning, so next question please,” she voice turned steely for only a moment.  “Still, it doesn’t really matter. We get by. I work, and she’s in school. She loves it more than I ever did.”

“Needless to say she won’t be having fist fights in the art room anytime soon?”

“No,” she chuckled. In the lamp light she saw just how tired and weathered he now looked. The brown in his hair was now flecked with grey, gone was the uniform she’d seen him in almost every day, replaced with his cozy white sweater and a pair of jeans. His eyes had a more haunted look. Placing her tea mug on the table, she reached over and placed her hand over his. “What’s this about, Ben?”

He said nothing in response.

“You did so much for me all those years ago, Benton. You made me a better person…”

“You did that on your own, Kelly. I didn’t do much.”

“Not true,” she insisted. “Without you I’d be in terrible shape right now. I’d probably have had to give her up, because I wouldn’t have had the tools to raise her as best I can. I owe everything to you, Benton Fraser. I want you to know that.”

He nodded, almost struck dumb.

“However, it _is_ two in the morning, and I was just about to fall asleep before you got here.”

“I’m sorry for waking you up.”

“Oh don’t you worry, I’m not fussed. But it’s too late for you to be driving anywhere else tonight, and the couch isn’t that comfortable.”

“I can sleep on the floor, that’s not a problem.”

“No…” she pulled him close and kissed him soundly. “Come sleep beside me tonight. It’s been a long time since I’ve had someone who’s not small enough to kick me in the ribs sleep in my bed.”

“Thank you kindly, Kelly,” he accepted her offer, following her up the stairs.

They held each other close all night, arms wrapped around each other’s bodies.

The alarm went off only a few hours later, but Kelly woke up completely alert, as though she’d slept for three days straight. Untangling herself from the warmth of Benton’s body, she put on her bathrobe and quickly showered before heading downstairs to start breakfast. Rachel would be waking up soon, though how to explain what Ben was still doing at the house, well Kelly wasn’t sure how she was going to do that quite yet.

Putting on a pot of tea, she soon heard him coming down the stairs, and it was perfect timing too. He’d already showered and dressed. She was sure he’d help her explain to Rachel why he was there so early in the morning.

“Tea?” she asked.

“Thank you kindly,” he answered, accepting the mug and finding milk and sugar just as Rachel came down the stairs, her arms crossed over her chest.

“Banana…” she mumbled.

“Who’s a banana?” Kelly asked in response.

Rachel pointed at her.

“ _I’m_ a banana, well that’s nice to know,” Kelly pulled open the fridge and found a pitcher of juice. “Good morning, Rachel…” she added as she poured a small serving of juice and set it on the table.

“I’m grumpy…” was her only response as she climbed into her chair and pouted.

“That’s because you just woke up,” Kelly answered.

“No it’s not!”

“Rachel…” Kelly gave her a warning glance. “Remember we have a guest.”

Rachel knocked her glass of juice over in response, sending liquid and plastic to the floor.

Benton said nothing, knowing it best not to interfere.

Kelly walked over and picked the juice glass up. “You go back to your room and we’ll start this morning over again…” she kept her voice level, which in some ways surprised him. That wasn’t to say that he wasn’t proud of her for such a thing, but the Kelly he remembered would not have been able to keep her temper for very long.

Rachel stuck out her tongue and made her way back up the stairs, stomping each step.

“Just for that you’ve earned yourself an extra 5 minutes time out!” she called up the stairs as Rachel’s bedroom door slammed, but not before the little girl shrieked “You don’t love me!”

“Yes I know, I’m the meanest mommy in the whole wide world,” she rolled her eyes. Going back into the kitchen, she placed the cup in the sink and started on the mess with paper towels. “Benton, would you mind grabbing me a damp washcloth?” she asked from her position on the floor.

“Certainly,” he did as she asked, bending down to help her. “She’s just like you were, you know.”

“Oh no she’s not…”

“Deny it all you like, Kelly, but I seem to remember you screaming at me when I took you back home after they’d finished questioning you about your uncle’s barn burning down. Something about you not being my problem and not needing to know everything.”

She stopped wiping and looked him in the eyes. “Oh my God, you’re right. I knew it!”

“Hmm? Knew what?”

“Whenever I got into trouble, my mom would always say to me ‘I hope you have a daughter just like you one day’, so that she’d make me as miserable as I made her. And lo and behold, I did.” She ran her free hand down her face, trying to focus her thoughts in one direction. “Still, I wouldn’t trade her for anything. She’s one of the two good things I’ve ever done with my life.”

You didn’t need to be a genius to understand what that meant.

It took a good five minutes to clean up the mess and set the kitchen right. Once she’d finished, they sat at the counter recounting their adventures in the north, warming their hands around mugs of tea.

“Mommy?” they heard a tiny voice call.

“One second Benton,” she stopped him mid- sentence and went to the staircase to see Rachel now sitting on the top stairs, cuddling her teddy.

Kelly sat on the stairs beside her little girl and waited.

“I’m sorry,” Rachel told her.

“I am too, Rachel,” she answered. “I was really looking forward to having a nice breakfast with you and Benton, and that temper tantrum spoiled it.”

Rachel looked as though she were about to cry.

“But I’m glad you’re ready to come back downstairs and have breakfast with us now,” Kelly brought her daughter into her arms and kissed her temple. “Now, you need to say you’re sorry to Benton too. That wasn’t fair to him.”

She nodded.

“Now go on.” She followed Rachel down the stairs and walked past her into the kitchen while she tugged on his sleeve.

Benton moved off the chair and bent down to the four-year-old’s level.

“Mommy said I should say I’m sorry,” she confessed.

Benton flicked Rachel’s nose in response and smiled.

Rachel went into the kitchen and pulled open the fridge. “What’s for breakfast, Mommy?”

“Pancakes sound good to you, Benton?”

“My favourite,” he quipped.

“Can we put bananas in them?” Rachel asked.

The child and her taste for bananas. She could never figure out where it had come from. “Sure.”

“And after breakfast can I go outside and play?”

“Of course you can, just keep your jacket and boots on, and stay in the front yard.”

“But there’s no one to play with in the front yard!”

“So do you want to play with Jessie today then?”

“Will you call Jessie’s mommy and ask?”

“Sure, but let’s get some breakfast in you first. It’s too early to call Jessie’s mom yet.”

“Okay…” Rachel was content for the time being. Kelly quickly prepared pancakes while her daughter and Ben sat at the table, tea mug and plastic juice cup in hand.

“Um… Benton?” Rachel asked.

“Yes Rachel?”

“Where did you come from?”

“Oh all sorts of places, really. I’m a traveler.”

“Where do you go?”

“Anywhere I want.”

“Even outer space?” Rachel had always enjoyed stories about other planets, and Kelly had told her less complicated versions of her travels with Benton. She knew that they spent a lot of time outside, and traveling by dog sled, but not about the nights spent huddled together in a tent, and not just for warmth. A four-year-old wouldn’t be able to comprehend such things.

“No, not outer space,” he answered.

“Oh,” Rachel whispered in awe. “But how did you meet my mommy then? She’s only ever lived here.”

Kelly stopped, nearly dropping the bowl containing pancake batter.

**ooOoo**

Kelly and Benton locked eyes, silently begging him not to reveal the enormity of their adventures. He smiled, his eye twinkling, and she knew her secrets were safe.

“Ah well, your mom and I met a long time ago, one of my many adventures. We kind of met by accident when we were younger, and I asked her to travel with me for a while.”

“Mommy, how long did you travel?”

“I think it was about… two years.” Occam’s Razor at work, he noticed. The simplest explanation is often the right one.

“Did you date?”

This time Kelly dropped the bowl, catching it before it slid off the counter and onto the floor. Out of the mouths of babes.

“Yes,” Kelly answered once she’d recovered. “Yes we did. We were very young though, and that was before you were born,” Kelly figured she might as well be honest.

“Was it fun?”

“Was what fun?”

“When you traveled.”

So the question of whether or not they dated was just a one off.

“Yes it was, and sometimes it was scary and sometimes it was sad, but it was wonderful all the same,” Kelly flipped two finished pancakes on to Rachel’s plate and cut them into bite sized pieces. “There’s two pancakes, love. If you’re still hungry you can have another.”

“Thank you Mommy…”

Kelly served both herself and Benton, enjoying their simple meal in relative silence. Once dishes had been cleared away and Jessie’s mother Karen had agreed to look after Rachel for the day, the trio set off down the road. Karen met them at the gate, waving to Kelly and Rachel as they approached.

“Bye sweetie, have fun,” she kissed Rachel’s cheek and sent her into the yard where Jessie was waiting. “Karen, what time should I pick her up?”

“She can stay for supper, I don’t mind…”

“Oh thank you,” Kelly smiled. “I’ll be back by seven, sound alright?”

“Perfect, go do what you need to do,” Karen looked over Kelly’s shoulder in the distance. “Who’s that?”

Kelly turned around to see Benton lift his hat to them.

“An old friend, haven’t seen him in years."

“He’s not…”

“No,” she answered. “No he’s not.” The question was better left unsaid, though the answer was plainly obvious. “Anyway, thanks again. See you around seven.” Kelly went back out the gate. “Rachel, be good and listen to Karen!”

“Bye Mommy!” she and Jessie ran into the back garden as Kelly turned and walked back toward her own house, Benton walking calmly beside her, his hands in his jacket pockets.

“I’m not what?” he asked as they turned the corner.

Damn! She’d hoped he wouldn’t have picked up on that. But, remembering that he had very sensitive hearing, she reached into her pocket and produced the key to her front door, mumbling something as she did.

“What’s that?”

“Not Rachel’s dad.” They moved into her front hallway.

“Well, can you be sure?” he asked. “You and I both know it could be a possibility. After all, we were in each other’s beds pretty regularly at the time.”

“Benton,” she stopped him mid-sentence, taking off her jacket and hanging it back up in the closet. “I’m not cruel. I would have told you if you were her father.”

“Does anyone know?”

“No,” she shook her head. “No one knows. I mean, _I_ know, obviously, but I never told anyone.”

“Whoever this guy is, does he know about her?”

“Yep.”

“And?”

“And what?”

“Visitations? Phone calls? Letters? Child support, perhaps?”

Kelly let out a snort and made her way back to the kitchen. “Wishful thinking, that,” she led him into the living room. “Look, if I still cared I’d have gone after him a long time ago.”

“Oh alright, alright, none of my business. I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

“Benton, we’re fine,” she insisted, sitting herself on the couch and waiting for him to do the same. “If we were in absolute dire straits, I’d find a way out. But seeing as Rachel and I are not that desperate, I’d say we’re fine.”

“Okay,” he figured he should leave the subject for the time being. He trusted her, just as she trusted him.

They sat in silence, Kelly trying not to look at him. He’d been her greatest ally and her best friend for those two years, and he’d helped her immensely. But then it had started. The silence, the hardened stares, the snapping… each time it tore at her. She hadn’t been able to understand why, it had been so quick, and it had hit her like a ton of bricks. Frankly, it had gotten to the point where she hadn’t been able to take it. She was not a doormat, and he knew that, and in the end, in order to save her sanity and the last bit of respect she had for him… she left.

“What happened to us?”

“Hmm?”

“What happened to us? Not romantic us, I mean, there’s a big difference between romance and sex, and we both know it was the result of us needing someone…”

“Kelly…” he drew out her name.

“Okay, okay…” she stopped. “Look, what I really wanted to know was, what did I do?”

His brow furrowed.

“One day it was like you couldn’t stand to look at me. Like I was an inconvenience.”

“You were never…”

“Let me finish,” she kept her voice even.

It seemed that she’d learned shouting really wouldn’t solve anything, but he almost wished she would. He knew he deserved it, but this was agonizing. He knew they had to hash this out, whatever this was, and he’d been avoiding it.

“I didn’t understand anything after you left for the Academy and then disappeared into the Arctic after our adventure together,” she admitted. “All those things you told me I’d get to do if we were just friends, and then something happened. Something I did, but I still don’t know what.”

“It wasn’t something you did,” he stressed.

“So why did I get stuck in the middle of it?”

“You were never meant to get stuck in all those plans that I had,” he told her. “And by the end… it was just time.”

“That’s the easy answer, Benton, and you know it.”

‘Yes I do know,” he answered.

“So why not answer my question?”

He was silent.

“There is no answer, is there?”

He looked at her with sad eyes.

“I never meant to hurt you, Kelly,” he admitted.

“Yet you did,” she still would not raise her voice, and he was still hoping she would. Of course it would hurt, but it would make him feel better in some strange way. “I wept for days on end after I left you, but really I didn’t know what for. Was it something I did that made you so angry? Something I said?”

“You didn’t need me anymore, Kelly, and I could see you wanted your independence. I’d hoped…”

“That if you pushed me away I’d suddenly realize that it was for the best? That I’d be alright simply because you said I would be? That I’d go back and live my life as if nothing had happened? Because let me tell you Benton, that doesn’t happen. Nothing has ever been the same.”

“I know.”

“Of course you know, but that doesn’t make it any easier,” she wanted to yell, but she wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. She had to keep the upper hand, whether she wanted to or not. “How did you know I didn’t need you anymore? Because that wasn’t true.”

“It _was_ true, but you had convinced yourself that you still needed me,” he reasoned. “I needed to give you that extra push.”

She rolled her eyes.  “So in order to do that you had to completely crush me?”

“It wouldn’t have registered with you any other way.”

“That’s complete bullshit,” she told him. “I’m the one who was supposed to watch your back. Without me, who would you have had?”

“I told you, Kelly, I always end up alone in the end.”

“But you shouldn’t have to,” she insisted. “You need someone, Benton. You needed me just as I needed you. You aren’t meant to be alone. You’re not a robot, we all need someone.”

He wasn’t about to argue with that logic.

“And just last night… well that was one of the most wonderful nights of my life, just holding you like I used to, and I’ll never forget it, but it’s not meant to be a cover up. You’re hurting, and I don’t know how to help you.”

He gave her a smile. “As I said, I needed to apologize to you. That was help enough.”

“Benton….”

The front door flew open, a cold wind blowing through.

“Shit!” she cursed, getting up and slamming it shut. “Damn lock, never sticks. Been meaning to replace it.”

And while she wasn’t looking, he breathed a sigh of relief.

**ooOoo**

“So, as I was about to say until the front door blew open,” Kelly came back and sat in the same chair she had occupied before. “You need someone, just as all humans do. You needed me at the time, just as I did, but if I know you, you’re too damn stubborn to admit it.”

He said nothing.

“And if I didn’t need you anymore, why would leaving you have hurt me so much? Why did I end up pregnant and moving to this place where I was constantly stared at for not having gotten married first? Why did I end up taking a cab to and from the hospital, giving birth with only a doctor and two nurses in the room and having to rely on Karen and her husband for food until I was recovered enough to get a job and Rachel old enough to get into daycare? Hmm? Now that you’re armed with _that_ information, explain to me how I didn’t need you anymore.”

She was slowly losing her composure, and the sinking feeling in his stomach returned.

“That’s what I thought,” she got up and went into the kitchen, not daring to look at him, for fear that she’d start yelling and perhaps never stop. He heard her fumbling around in the cupboard, if for no other reason than to distract herself. Finally, he heard a mug slip and tumble to the floor. Getting up, he went to the archway that separated the kitchen from the living room, and waited.

She dropped to her knees, attempting to pick up the bigger pieces with her hands before moving to clean up the smaller pieces with a dust pan and brush. Turning over the largest piece, she realized exactly which mug it was.

“Oh shit!” she moaned. It was the mug Karen had taken to be decorated for her on Rachel’s belief when Rachel had first turned three. It read: _To Mommy, Happy Mother’s Day, Love Rachel._ And now it lay in pieces on her kitchen floor.

It was the straw that broke the camel’s back. He knew what he had to do, seeing the hurt and sadness in her eyes. He went to her, got to his knees on the floor beside her, and quietly wrapped his arm around her shoulders. The shock of all that had happened in the past few days suddenly came crashing down on her, and the first of many tears streamed down her cheeks.

Holding her close, he waited silently as her anger and sorrow progressed to her fists, landing the first blow into his chest. She screamed, crying at the same time, and it broke his heart. She’d never had a chance to grieve properly, and she’d held herself together long enough to warrant a good cry.

She hit his chest again, secretly hoping she’d leave a bruise. Again and again, her fist landed precisely where she aimed it, and he didn’t bother to stop it.

_Thump_

“It’s…”

_Thump_

“Your…”

_Thump_

“Fault!”

“I know…” he whispered into her hair as she clutched the lapels on his jacket. “I know, Kelly, and I’m sorry. I really am. I’m sorry whoever you ended up with left you on your own to raise your baby. I’m sorry you had to give birth on your own, I’m sorry you had to rely on your neighbour to feed you until you could find a job, and I’m sorry I pushed you away.” 

She said nothing in return, just wept. She couldn’t restrain herself, clutching the lapels of his jacket, willing him to stay but disappear at the same time.

“It’s alright, Kelly,” she heard. He cradled her as he had all those years ago in his bed, stroking her hair. As her sobs gradually gave way to gentle hiccups, he kissed her forehead.

She sighed. Untangling herself, she picked herself up and quickly swept up the pieces.

“It’s only a mug,” she said out loud, emptying the dustpan into the garbage.

He knew that outburst hadn’t just been about the mug. It had been about everything that had happened to her while she’d traveled with him. Inuvik, Tuktoyaktuk, Whitehouse, Fort Smith, Baffin Island... She’d felt horribly betrayed by him, and in his own way, he knew it was true. He’d done it to her, and until now he’d never realized just how badly she’d been affected.

In truth, he’d come to see her and ask her if she wished to join him again. He wanted to make it up to her, but with Rachel now in the picture, so to speak, he knew she’d reject the offer.

Part of him still wanted to ask her, just so he could hear her say no. Glutton for punishment, he supposed.

“Kelly…” he got up and stayed her hand on the counter. “We should talk about this.”

“What’s there to talk about?” was her reply. “I thought that’s what we were doing.”

“There are still things left unsaid.”

“Better that way, don’t you think?”

“No,” he admitted. “If things are left unsaid then it’ll still be there whether we talk about it or not. Eventually it’ll eat away at you, it’ll eat away at me, and we’ll never resolve it because we’ll be too embarrassed or angry to do so.”

“Alright…” she made her way to the kitchen table and made a point of sitting down, crossing one leg over the other and crossing her arms over her chest. “Talk.”

And talk they did. So much so that she’d lost track of the time, only looking up when she heard the front door open and Rachel kicking her shoes off.

“Oh Karen, I’m sorry. I completely lost track of the time,” Kelly went to the front door and apologized. “I hope she behaved herself?”

“Of course, she and Jessie had a great time,” Karen smiled. “She’s always welcome, anytime.”

“You’re an absolute Godsend,” Kelly told her, shooing Rachel upstairs to her room to wash up and put her pajamas on.

Karen looked over Kelly’s shoulder again, catching Ben’s eye.

“How do you do?” he offered politely.

Karen could only smile, giving Kelly a sly look at the same time.

“What?”

“You’ll have to tell me all about this mysterious friend of yours later,” Karen told her.

“No I won’t,” came Kelly’s curt reply.

It seemed Karen knew Kelly well enough not to press the matter any further. Saying goodbye, Kelly shut the door and came back into the kitchen.

“So, how that we’ve talked and hashed things out, what else is there to say?”

“Nothing really I suppose,” he answered. “Although, I did want to ask you one thing.”

She stayed quiet, gesturing for him to continue.

“Come with me.”

He already knew what her answer would be, but if she said it, he’d know for sure.

“I can’t,” she whispered, sitting down at the table and placing her hand over his. “I’d love to, really, I would, but Rachel needs me. I’m all she’s got.”

He nodded. Exactly what he’d thought she’d say.

“I guess I should go then,” there was a sad tone to his voice. She knew it was for the best. He’d go on, like he always did. He’d find someone else to travel with, someone else who needed him.

“Benton,” she followed him to the door, grabbing his hand and squeezing. “Even though I know it’s for the best, promise me two things….”

He waited.

“Find someone,” she told him. “You’re not meant to be alone. Find someone who needs you, someone you can help and who can help you in return.”

He nodded once.

“And don’t leave without saying goodbye to Rachel.”

He laid his hand gently upon her cheek. Opening the back door to the garden, he stepped outside and walked toward that familiar truck.

Rachel came bounding out the door behind them. “Benton!” she called, clutching something in her tiny hand. “Benton, wait!”

He turned and scooped the young girl into his arms. Placing her on his hip, Kelly smiled at the two of them.

“For you,” she told him, wrapping her arms around his neck.

He hugged her back and set her back down, putting what she’d given him in the breast pocket of his jacket.

“Time for me to go,” he told them, Kelly coming forward to hug him goodbye, thanking him for coming back. If nothing else, for coming back.

He released her, bent and flicked Rachel’s nose, opened the door to the truck, and got inside, turning the key and backing out of the driveway.

Mother and daughter watched as the truck went down the road, and then he was gone. 

“Will Benton be back?”

“Someday,” Kelly answered, taking her daughter’s hand and leading her back into the house. “I do hope someday.”

**ooOoo**

Benton settled back in his cabin with a cup of tea, and reached into the breast pocket of his jacket. Unfolding the piece of paper Rachel had given him, he smiled as he read it. Sighing, he closed his eyes and fell asleep in the chair.

Tomorrow he’d think of something. 

**ooOoo**

And a week later, Rachel Joanne McShane, on the occasion of her fifth birthday, awoke to a small box neatly placed on her bedside table. Opening it, she squealed with delight and ran down the stairs.

“Mommy, look!”

Kelly smiled, knowing full well who it had come from, as she’d found it in the mailbox and had put it on her daughter’s bedside table while she slept.

For out of the box came a necklace. A simple gold chain with a small charm in the shape of a wolf, and a note.

“What’s it say, Mommy?” she bounced up and down as Kelly helped her put the necklace on.

“Hold still so I can do up the back of this and then I’ll read it,” Kelly chuckled. Rachel did as she was told, and went to the fridge in search of breakfast.

Kelly opened the note that came with it, sipping her mug of tea as she did so.

_Dear Rachel,_

_I’m sorry I can’t be there for your birthday, but I think you should have a little something to celebrate. Enclosed you will find your birthday present, I hope you like it._

_I’ll see you again someday. Enjoy your day._

_Signed,_

_Benton Fraser, RCMP_

_P.S. Kelly, I do too._

Kelly smiled to herself, folded the note in half again, and tucked it in her pocket.

“I know,” she whispered to no one in particular.

She knew Benton Fraser would find her again someday, she’d just have to wait until he was ready.

And who really knew when that would be?


End file.
